News To Me: Madonna Plans Live Sex Act With Goat For Super Bowl Halftime Show

Desperate to stay culturally relevant at plus 50 years of age and amid far less younger pop star imitators, Madonna is planning a live sex act with a goat for her upcoming halftime show at Super Bowl XLVI. Madonna announced her intentions to give the world a show that will, “blow everyone’s mind,” and on top of performing her classic, chart-topping hits, she revealed she would engage in a live sex act with a farm animal. While details are still being worked out, the halftime act is said to feature no more than 12 animals, in addition to hundreds of back-up dancers and an expensive light and stage show. But the appearance of the goat has become the focal point of her show, and Madonna has not backed off promising a wild show for the audience.

“I want to give my fans – who are the best in the world – an experience and a performance that will live up to the legend of the biggest game of the year,” Madonna stated to the crowd at her Super Bowl press conference yesterday, where she answered questions from the world’s media and revealed her intentions to feature a goat as a sexual partner during her medley. “The Super Bowl is the perfect blend of sports and entertainment and I want to do something that will blow the minds of everyone watching and say, Tom Brady who? Eli Manning what? I want this to be remembered as the Super Bowl halftime show to outdo all Super Bowl halftime shows.”

Madonna, right, and the goat, left, could not be reached for comment about the upcoming Super Bowl halftime show.

“Madonna has been on the cutting edge of pop culture since her debut,” said Madonna spokesperson Becka Sparkles. “Whether she was writhing around in a wedding dress on MTV, posing nude in her books, or sleeping with the NBA, she has always been a controversial, edgy star that likes to push her audience, and Super Bowl Sunday will be no different. We at the Madonna camp are very excited for her performance!”

Her proclamation has sent the social media world ablaze, with Twitter followers both embracing and denouncing the idea, as well as piqued the curiosity of the music world.

“You go @materialgirl – get that goat hard gurl! @kanyewest” was posted on Kanye West’s Twitter account late last night, and Madonna’s personal facebook page has already received 12,000 likes since the press conference announcement.

While Hollywood has applauded her decision for putting on an original and extremely controversial live show that will no doubt bring in countless viewers, many are up in arms about the act, just wondering how a sex act with an animal will play before a large middle America audience, and if the goat in question will be from an organic farm. And the lingering question of whether a goat penetrating a woman will be appropriate for TV has spawned massive debate. The Super Bowl is still recovering from 2003’s Nipplegate, when Janet Jackson’s exposed breast was displayed to an audience of millions and thousands of dollars of fines were levied at CBS. Will Madonna’s performance lead to another fine, or worse, a banning or the network feed dropping the performance?

“I think that the Super Bowl audience is just not ready to see 54 year old Madonna gyrate on stage and engage sexually with anything, human or otherwise,” said Cal Booncockle, member of the Committee of Representatives Against Popstar Indecency. CRAPI members plan to protest the halftime show outside Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis, and spread CRAPI literature about the harms of sexualizing goats and other animals for entertainment value. “American values is not about showing musicians and goats lying aside one another in the biblical sense. We don’t want to see withered old beast forced to perform on stage for the amusement of a football crowd. And we don’t want to see any goats on stage either!”

The goat in question could not be reached for comment.

Leave A Comment

Featuring Recent Posts WordPress Widget development by YD